Manipulate a child’s mind.

Parental Alienation and The Nurturing of Hate.Parental Alienation Chart - 2016

It may appear as though the child is happy about their new, parent-less status, but suppressing a relationship with the other parent is emotionally unhealthy and impacts them for a lifetime. This is a reality in Albion, PA, where children and parents are impacted, just as it is a reality all across the World. We need to find people who can help.

Parental Alienation is a term used to describe the behavior of a parent and often other family members who manipulate a child’s mind with the motive of severing all ties between the child and the other parent. The agenda is packed with various tactics and actions are pre-meditated. When the pressure on the child to remain loyal to the alienating parent becomes too intense, the child gives up, and total rejection of the other parent becomes reality.PA IS EMOTIONAL ABUSE-COLLAGE - 2016

Interestingly enough, one elementary school counselor took a brochure but told me she is told “not to get involved” with these situations. My response to her was, “That is a problem.” I have to question if people understand that parental alienation is emotional bruising just as physical abuse leaves visible marks on a child’s body. It harms a child’s development. Do people care or are they ignorant? Are we failing our children by not facing reality? What kind of society do we live in?

Parents who are on a mission to destroy a bond between a child and the other parent can only be punished through the courts and by God. There is little we can do about them and their behavior. They tell others they are “protecting” their child and make the child feel like the other parent is unworthy of a relationship with their child. Something no child should have to hear, for that parent is parent of who they are.

Parents who are on the receiving end of the alienation are often helpless. There is little they can by themselves. They stand helpless, as they watch the relational death between themselves and their children. They watch their children construct a wall between them as a result of the brainwashing. The parents witness the joy being drained out of their children’s lives, as they are asked to spy, lie, and even partake in the intense denigration. They watch their children sabotage their time with them in order to remain abnormally loyal to the alienating parent (and family). Alienated parents cannot help their own children because they are portrayed as the enemy. The courts fail them too.

Family courts embrace adversarial situations and often empower the alienating parent. Alienating parents have passed the course in manipulation and are very convincing. As a result, the courts lack of education, empathy, knowledge of children development or need for power further hurts the child.PAS Normalizing - 2016

The damage caused by the breakup of families is not going away, especially if we continually turn our backs on the abuse. Research shows that 20-25% of children in divorce situations are alienated from a parent. The impact lasts a life time. That was evident as I spoke to adults, in Albion, PA, who were alienated from their children.

Teachers, college professors, pastors, ministers, doctors, counselors, coaches and many others can begin to help children in an area that is desperately needed. Right relationships are what life is all about! Parental alienation is real, parental alienation is child abuse!

Daughter Begs Mom to Get a Family Law Lawyer

PARENTAL ALIENATION, PARENTAL ALIENATION DISORDER, PARENTAL ALIENATION SYNDROME “Abusive” Parents Alienate and Psychologically “Batter” Children In Alienation of Affection, Best Interest of the Child, child abuse, Child Custody, Child Support, Children and Domestic Violence, Childrens Rights, Civil Rights, Department of Social Servies, Divorce, Domestic Relations, False Allegations of Domestic Violence, Family Court Reform, Family Rights, Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress, kidnapped children, Marriage, Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy, parental alienation, Parental Alienation Disorders, Parental Alienation Syndrome, Parental Kidnapping, Parents rights, Restraining Orders on December 8, 2009 at 9:45 pm Parents following divorce are called upon to cooperate with the other parent after divorce in case involving children.  Those parents who cannot put aside the anger, hate, and mental illness problems usually wind up “abusing” the children by alienating them from the the other parent. Alienation has been called a form of psychological “battering” of children.  For children that suffer from a custodial parent’s “battering“, I refer to an article from Jayne Major, Ph.D., an expert in the abuse that “abusive ” that accurately can describe the behavior of parents that commit Parental Alienation against a child” “The alienating parent’s hatred can have no bounds. The severest form will bring out every horrible allegation known, including claims of domestic violence, stalking and the sexual molestation of the child. Many fathers say that there have been repeated calls to the Department of Family and Child Services alleging child abuse and neglect. In most cases the investigators report that they found nothing wrong. However, the indoctrinating parent feels that these reports are not fabrications, but very, very real. She can describe the horror of what happen in great detail. Regardless of the actual truth, in her mind, it did happen. Most of the alienated fathers that I work with are continually befuddled by her lying. “How can she lie like that?” They don’t realize that these lies are not based on rational thinking. They are incapable of understanding the difference between what is true and what they want to be true. A vital part of fighting PAS is to understand the severity of the psychological disturbance that is the source of it.” For parents on the other end of this intense hatred from the “abusive” parent, most psychologist counsel being as actively involved with your children as possible, but sometimes, the psychological “battering” by the alienating parent eventually turns the child against the targeted parent. In some cases, the child loses all touch with reality, and becomes a carbon copy of the “abusive” parents and hates the everyone and the world. That is why is has become even more imperative that Parental Alienation, Parental Alienation Syndrome or even Parental Alienation Disorder (as it has been suggested) be included in the next version of the American Psychological Association DSM book. With recognition by the APA, children can get real help for their problems and can be psychologically rescued from “abusive” and parents that “batter.”

PARENTAL ALIENATION, PARENTAL ALIENATION DISORDER, PARENTAL ALIENATION SYNDROME
“Abusive” Parents Alienate and Psychologically “Batter” Children
In Alienation of Affection, Best Interest of the Child, child abuse, Child Custody, Child Support, Children and Domestic Violence, Childrens Rights, Civil Rights, Department of Social Servies, Divorce, Domestic Relations, False Allegations of Domestic Violence, Family Court Reform, Family Rights, Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress, kidnapped children, Marriage, Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy, parental alienation, Parental Alienation Disorders, Parental Alienation Syndrome, Parental Kidnapping, Parents rights, Restraining Orders on December 8, 2009 at 9:45 pm
Parents following divorce are called upon to cooperate with the other parent after divorce in case involving children. Those parents who cannot put aside the anger, hate, and mental illness problems usually wind up “abusing” the children by alienating them from the the other parent.
Alienation has been called a form of psychological “battering” of children. For children that suffer from a custodial parent’s “battering“, I refer to an article from Jayne Major, Ph.D., an expert in the abuse that “abusive ” that accurately can describe the behavior of parents that commit Parental Alienation against a child”
“The alienating parent’s hatred can have no bounds. The severest form will bring out every horrible allegation known, including claims of domestic violence, stalking and the sexual molestation of the child. Many fathers say that there have been repeated calls to the Department of Family and Child Services alleging child abuse and neglect.
In most cases the investigators report that they found nothing wrong. However, the indoctrinating parent feels that these reports are not fabrications, but very, very real. She can describe the horror of what happen in great detail. Regardless of the actual truth, in her mind, it did happen.
Most of the alienated fathers that I work with are continually befuddled by her lying. “How can she lie like that?” They don’t realize that these lies are not based on rational thinking. They are incapable of understanding the difference between what is true and what they want to be true. A vital part of fighting PAS is to understand the severity of the psychological disturbance that is the source of it.”
For parents on the other end of this intense hatred from the “abusive” parent, most psychologist counsel being as actively involved with your children as possible, but sometimes, the psychological “battering” by the alienating parent eventually turns the child against the targeted parent. In some cases, the child loses all touch with reality, and becomes a carbon copy of the “abusive” parents and hates the everyone and the world.
That is why is has become even more imperative that Parental Alienation, Parental Alienation Syndrome or even Parental Alienation Disorder (as it has been suggested) be included in the next version of the American Psychological Association DSM book. With recognition by the APA, children can get real help for their problems and can be psychologically rescued from “abusive” and parents that “batter.”

My daughter, JJ, was angry—so much, it seemed she would reach up and shake the clouds until they thunder, and cold bullets of rain explode against the Earth.

 The day started out so well—sleeping in late, and cuddling up on the couch with bowels of cold cereal on our laps while we watched cartoons. Then visiting the grandparents she missed and repeatedly asked to see. JJ romped and played with her cousins in the bright afternoon sun. She splashed in the pool, and dried off jumping on the trampoline. Grandpa ordered a pizza for lunch, and we all dove in—cheese dripping off our fingers, our faces smeared with spicy tomato sauce signaled delight.

JJ didn’t want to leave. I couldn’t blame her—her father, Mr. X, decided that he doesn’t like my parents and has been actively working to keep my children separated from their maternal grandparents, basically all my relatives, and any connection to our heritage. This was especially cruel because Mr. X used to allow the children overnight visits with their grandparents.

My parents created a room in the house for the children—with bunk beds to sleep and a closet overflowing with toys. The dresser was filled with clothes my parents bought for my children. Even the kitchen cupboards were filled with brightly colored plastic plates in animal shapes, bottles of water, and healthy snacks for the kids—Grandpa made sure they ate organic, and drank purified water.
My children share a close, loving relationship with their grandparents; they suffer a tremendous amount of grief due to alienation and an unjust legal order tearing my family apart.

gardening - 2016
Which brings me to the park… I left my parent’s home to bring my daughter and my toddler, RJ, to a museum. Time was running short, and JJ was a bit cranky so I drove to the park instead. Grandpa - 2016
It was a warm, sunny day and the playground was filled with noisy children. RJ ran happily toward the slide. JJ hung back, almost refusing to walk. She crossed her arms over her chest, tucked her chin down and wouldn’t look at me. When I asked JJ what was wrong she only replied in grumbling noises. JJ glared at the playground like I was dragging her into the pit of hell. I did my best to ignore her, and tried to remain upbeat, hoping some distraction would lift the clouds—to no avail. When I tried to talk to JJ she completely ignored me, and continued to grumble.

I was not deterred by JJ’s attitude—she is so much like me in her personality and energy. I once had a fighting spirit that was only broken by a brutal act committed by Mr. X that left me silent and complacent. I admire the fighting spirit in my daughter; I know it is going to save her from the abuse and dysfunction she is now living in. As much as I want to reach out to JJ, I also want to honor her fighting spirit—what she was trying to tell me—and find a way she can talk and feel that her words are valued, that I am listening.  So I sit a few feet from JJ  and spoke, not looking at her because I knew this would invite challenge and said, “You look like you are upset and want to say something. I am here if you need to talk. I won’t bother you or make you talk, but just know when you are ready I am listening. I love you a lot and I really want to help if I can.”

JJ glared at me. She didn’t say anything for several minutes and then, “I want to go back to Grandma’s house! Why can’t I see my Grandma? It’s not fair! I used to get to see her all the time.”

I always try to be careful what I say to the kids about anything court related but try to give them enough that there is some resolution so they are not left with more questions. “We only get one visit a month, and I try to fit everything in as best as I can. I will try to make more time to visit Grandpa and Grandma. I’m sorry about that.”

It’s not fair.” JJ grumbled, “Why can’t I see you more too?”

“I am not sure why, I did ask for more time but the court says only once a month. We will just have to do our best. I love you very much and think about you every day. I will keep asking for more time to visit, but we will have to be patient if that does not happen right away.”  I reply.

JJ is nearly shouting now, “Why can’t you talk to the judge? Tell him I want to come home! I want to see Grandma! It’s not fair!”

Honey, I did talk to the Judge and this is what he says… I did the best I could. Even if I can’t see you a lot, I will write letters and we can talk on the phone.” I was writing letters almost every week since the children have been taken from me, then Mr. X moved and won’t give me an address–any address–to send the letters. So now I only get to see the children once a month with no contact in between.

My daughter is furious, “Why don’t you get a lawyer? I saw on ‘Rockford’ that a lawyer is only $75! You could get a lawyer!” –Mr. X watches  the 1970’s detective series, “The Rockford Files”, my daughter must have been watching. I couldn’t help but to wonder if Jim Rockford were investigating my case, would things have turned out differently??

Honey, lawyers are more expensive than that. But I do my best talking to the Judge—and your Dad—on my own. This is what they decided, and I know it’s not easy but we just gotta do the best we can. No matter what, I love you, and thank God for you every day. I will keep asking for more time to visit with you.” It has taken alot of practise for me to remain this calm.

But I saw on ‘Rockford’..” JJ is nearly in tears now. Her shoulders sag, and she came to cuddle on my lap. “Rockford gets a lawyer all the time. You can too, Mommy…”

jim rockford photo: Jim Rockford Garner.jpg

I am near tears myself. I just want my children to have a normal, happy childhood—and to be their Mother. I see my children struggling, their safety is at risk, and now they are being kept away from their loving mother and anything that represents her…I don’t have money for a lawyer. And I don’t have the knowledge or skill to adequately represent myself in court pro se.  I don’t have the answers why. Why would Family Court conspire to take my children away? Why am I being denied my legal rights, and due process? Why is the Guardian ad Litem covering up evidence of abuse, refusing to interview witnesses and will not do a home observation with the children and I? Why is Judge Bobo refusing to do any sort of reunification efforts, even when I request? Why are these children continuing to show emotional distress and make concerning reports and no one is listening? I don’t have the answers. And they are not the answers a child should hear. So I keep my thoughts silent. Force a smile. And push the pain away…these questions will revisit me in the night, keeping me awake, only in silence and darkness, I don’t have to be so strong anymore, the tears fall. 

 So I do what I have been forced to do time and time again over the years, smile, try to act like everything is fine and enjoy the moments I have with my children. I scoop RJ up from the bottom of the slide, swing him in the air until he giggles and announce that we are going on a hike. We walk around a path meandering near the lake. I remember how warm my JJ’s hand feels, her fingers closing over mine…tears sparkle in her eyes but something else too: excitement. She dashes away to collect rocks and then again to help her baby brother climb a low hanging branch. And just for a few moments the pain passes away, the storm recedes into a brilliant blue sky, and we are family.

— M21

Family Court Injustice

My daughter was angry—so much, it seemed she would reach up and shake the clouds until they thunder, and cold bullets of rain explode against the Earth.

 The day started out so well—sleeping in late, and cuddling up on the couch with bowels of cold cereal on our laps while we watched cartoons. Then visiting the grandparents she missed and repeatedly asked to see. My daughter romped and played with her cousins in the bright afternoon sun. She splashed in the pool, and dried off jumping on the trampoline. Grandpa ordered a pizza for lunch, and we all dove in—cheese dripping off our fingers, our faces smeared with spicy tomato sauce signaled delight.

 

y daughter didn’t want to leave. I couldn’t blame her—her father, Martin, decided that he doesn’t like my parents and has been actively working to keep my children separated from their maternal grandparents, basically all…

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Parents Against Injustice. (Weekend round-up)

Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome  –  Alltop RSS – It’s easy enough to find material describing PAS and how devastating it can be. But this book actually proposes effective countermeasures.

Moms and Wives Have Found Their Voice in the Dads and Families Section  –  Rob Watson at The Good Men Project – 

And you can too. Read their thoughts and ideas here. Join the conversation on our Facebook Page. Submit your own articles. Together, we are raising the bar as to what it takes to be a father. The post Moms and Wives Have Found Their Voice in the Dads and Families Section appeared first on The Good Men Project.

SUPPORT OUR CAUSE – Children’s Rightsc369e-sap

La alienación parental y separar a los hijos de uno de sus padres es abuso infantil  –  viso at CUSTODIA PATERNA

Sábado, 27 de Febrero, 2016 Jorge Tirado Zamudio, sube una imagen en donde manifiesta una verdad como un castillo. “La alienación parental y separar a los hijos de uno de sus padres es abuso infantil”. Y además de los más graves, pues las consecuencias que repercuten sobre los menores seguirán con ellos y marcarán sus vidas por siempre. No puede considerado un entorno sano para el crecimiento de los menores, aquel en donde el menor recibe constantemente críticas de su padre (o de su madre, aunque sean menos los casos). Los jueces que estos niños poco a poco vayan siendo víctimas… more »

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